Will men and women ever get along?

If we think “no”,  how can we fix this? Equality in the sense of “identicality”, is it what we really want? The genome tells us that there is as much genetic difference between a male and female human as between a chimp and a human. However are all those genes of equal  importance? In any case it is also agreed that what might be more important is the phenotype and the environment which will turn some of those genes on or off. This, brain research results tell us,  is also done by our thoughts and feelings and most of all, by the symbolic world we adhere to. Indeed, this subtle world affects the human medial prefrontal cortex which is the true executive brain, albeit subconscious. It has a holistic property which is predominant in feminine minds.

The true difference is even more visible in how men and women see the world. Of course there are individual differences but in general, a feminine mind has a holistic point of view while a masculine mind tends to see the world as made of different boxes and categories.

feminine and masculine minds

An example to illustrate this might help. I live alone; I have charge of a large house. The roof is leaking, the spa is leaking, the leaves are so numerous and the weather so cold that I don’t see how I could take care of all of them, my son is coming soon and I have to prepare stuff for him to take back to his place, I saw a duck starving I have to feed it but what? A young woman was gang raped in India, taxes will increase next year, and what kind of meal should I prepare when my son will be here? The men who were supposed to take care of my broken patio door never showed up, I had an argument with a friend, I’ve put on weight on and feel heavy, etc… The feminine mind is holistic. It is a whole world and the ambiance of the daily life of a feminine mind is affected by all the details. It is acutely aware of perfection and harmony, of how things should be, of an underlying model, and sees the details and elements responsible for the lack of harmony. That woman will not truly relax as long as all these details are not taken care of. This is why women take care of small children; they will do their utmost to provide harmony for their little ones.

A masculine mind is different. Every element of the life of a man is compartmentalized and prioritized: sex, affections, house, friends, car, etc… Men can relax. A particular box is too full? That box is annoying? Evade, take a vacation, meet new people, have sex, do something else, switch off. That mind is limited in time and space. It sees and relish in the here and now.
This is really where the difference lays and why men and women have communication problems. If masculine minds would learn and understand the sacrifice and mandate of feminine minds, maybe then that men and women could finally get along and work together. Masculine minds would help feminine minds create a harmonious world of perfection; fixing one problem at a time without forgetting the whole picture…and happiness would be reachable for all.

see Isis Code and Love Them back to LIFE by Ariane Page

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